ADHD OVERVIEW ADHD & MARRIAGE
Marriages where one or both members of the couple have ADD can be plagued by misunderstandings, anger and frustration. These problems often arise from the misinterpretation of undiagnosed ADHD symptoms or, if the ADHD has been diagnosed, from both partners being unsure of what to do about it. The good news is that by understanding the role that ADHD plays in your relationship – by correctly interpreting what is happening to you and learning ways to make the interactions more positive – couples can not only improve their marriages, but thrive.
Dr. Hallowell offers a number of ways to learn how to thrive in relationships affected by ADHD. First, all of the Hallowell Centers offer counseling for couples interested in taming the ADHD interactions and misunderstandings in their relationship. Counseling may include treatment of ADHD, depression, anxiety and other issues, as well as therapy centered on developing strategies for improving the interactions between partners.
Dr. Hallowell, Sue Hallowell and Melissa Orlov new book, “Married to Distraction”, was released in March, 2010 deals with how to keep distraction from hurting your marriage. Dr. Hallowell and Ms. Orlov also write a blog and manage a forum on how ADHD affects marriage, which can be found at www.adhdmarriage.com
Dr. Edward Hallowell and his wife, Sue, appeared on Dr. Phil and discussed their new book Married to Distraction: Restoring Intimacy and Strengthening Your Marriage in an Age of Distraction. In the show they teach you how to spot hidden distractions in your relationship and reveal the mistakes you may not realize you’re making. Watch the interview.
Dr. Hallowell also recommends reading The ADHD Effect on Marriage: Undersand and Rebuild Your Relationship in Six Steps.
and the Marriage Meetings for Lasting Love: 30 Minutes a Week to the Relationship You’ve Always Wanted (New World Library,
February 14, 2014) psychotherapist and clinical social worker Marcia Naomi Berger offers today’s busy, often overextended couples a simple way to improve their marriage and work through challenges by committing to meeting with each other once a week without distractions
Did You Know?
1) Keep learning about ADD/ADHD! Some good places to start:
- Our ADD/ADHD overview page has a lot of helpful information, and is a good starting place
- Treatments for ADD/ADHD describes our recommended strategies for successfully adjusting to and coping with ADD/ADHD.
- Delivered From Distraction is one of the best introductions to ADD available
- The Top 10 questions about ADD
- The Top 10 newest findings about ADD
- Watch Dr. Hallowell discuss Kids and ADD, or ADD and education
2) If you believe that you or your child or spouse may have ADD/ADHD, get a professional diagnosis:
- The Hallowell Centers specialize in the diagnosis and treatment of ADD/ADHD, for those in or near Massachusetts or New York
- For those not near a Hallowell Center, we have a page to help you find a referral to someone qualified who can diagnose ADD/ADHD
- Ask your doctor about getting tested for ADD/ADHD
3) Remember that you are not alone! There is a tremendous community to support and help you. A few places to look, depending on your needs:
- CH.A.D.D. (Children and Adults with Attention Deficit Disorder): an excellent organization dedicated to helping and connecting those with ADD
- For those married to someone with ADD, or are ADD themselves, go to the Marriage Blog, which is also a community of people sharing their experiences
- National Attention Deficit Disorder Association: a non-profit organization that focuses on the needs of adults and young adults with ADD and ADHD. They sponsor an annual national conference on AD/HD.
Article on ADD and Relationships:
Feeling Lonely in Your Relationship? It Could be ADHD. Dr. Hallowell recommends reading this article by Melissa Orlov. Please click here to read:
ADHD and Marriage Blog Tips on Learning to Thrive in Your Relationship from Melissa Orlov and Dr. Hallowell